"Dear God,
This month you gave me an opportunity to fast for 21 days, and draw my strength from you. During this time, I learned many things about myself. I learned about what role food plays in my life, and most importantly, I learned that your grace knows no bounds. Your grace pours continuously over my life like a waterfall. It has been refreshing having this intimate time with you. The first few days of fasting dairy, meat, sweets, and refined/enriched pastas/grains, I felt so puny. I noticed that I was having trouble keeping my breathing in sync with my runs. I felt slow and powerless with my strength training. However, what I soon discovered was that my reliance on my physical power was trust misplaced. I was depending on food for energy and strength, when I really should have been depending on you.
Yes, food is important. It is a catalyst for many biological processes to occur in our bodies, but it is NOT our true energy source. Food does not awaken me in the morning, nor does it motivate me to get up at 5 am on Saturdays to run when I could be asleep. Once I realized this, I started to refocus and remember your promises. During this time, I also started to read the book of Daniel. I have read this book many times before. I love Daniel. He was such a visionary, a non-conformist. Even in the midst of captivity, he trusted in you to rescue him in times of trouble and to provide him with impeccable wisdom. He did not indulge in pagan pleasantries. He ate of the earth and proved to rulers that you did not have to feast on carnage to be strong. After a few days into my fast and meditating on your word, my strength began to rise. I felt renewed. I won't say that the fast was without its challenges, which I am quite sure the Devil threw my way. There were baby showers and work celebrations that featured some of my favorite foods. People would ask me to "Have some" and I would have to kindly refuse.I received many an odd stare from people who have told me I didn't need to lose any more weight, not understanding my purpose for not partaking of certain foods. My husband and son were still eating what they wanted too, as I ate a plate of vegetables. Yet I remained disciplined because I did not want to break my promise to you, and you were the one who carried me through when temptations got strong.
Although consumption of food is one of the most pleasurable experiences one can have, I now know that I can do without certain foods and be content. I can truly see how wasteful I was being, when there are people in this world who would be content with just a corner of a plate of food I inhale on a daily basis. This fast was not about losing weight, it was about gaining insight about your plans for me this year. I know that this will be a year of stability for me financially and personally. I have managed to really stick with something long enough to see the results. I am excited about opportunities to reach new goals. I thank you Lord, for using me to help my husband to also see the benefits of fasting on his own. Although he only fasted for two days, he too learned what it took me 21 days to discover. Even though I am not fasting any more, there are certain rules I still intend on following (i.e dairy free fridays, meatless mondays,sweetless sundays) just to remind me that I need not to indulge in food just because I can. I need to draw closer to you, because it is what you have called me to do. YOU are my energy source.
In your son, Jesus' name. I thank you."
Amen
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
2012: A Look Back
Wow! It has almost been two years since I decided I needed to make a right turn toward better health for good! I must say, I am very glad to see the holidays go. Although I always enjoy the family time and food, these times are also the Devil's playground for people on a weight loss/maintenance journey. The holidays are a stressful time, good or bad stress. When I am stressed, I tend to navigate toward unhealthy foods. Fortunately, thanks to a pretty routine running and weight training schedule, I managed to keep my weight under control. I have gained a couple of "happy pounds", but I plan on getting those off quickly in the new year. I recently took a visual inventory of myself, and I am "getting to happy" with what I see. I am not skinny, I am not fat. I am strong, toned, and retaining my femininity at the same time. This past weekend, I ran the fastest I have ever ran a 6 mile run, about 9 minutes and 40 seconds a mile. It was an awesome feeling!
Most of us are reflecting on the joys and sorrows, the triumphs and losses of the year right about now. A tradition I deeply miss is being able to go to my hometown church, Mt Vernon Missionary Baptist in Jacksonville, FL on New Year's Eve. There was always tons of singing, testimonies, and reflection on those members who have gone on to glory. A few minutes before midnight, we would all get on our knees and pray. Then the pastor announces the New Year! It was such a good feeling to be in a place I felt safe and loved. Although I won't be home for New Year's this year, I plan on getting on my knees five minutes before midnight, and thanking God for the blessings and the trials he has brought me through this past year. For those of you who may not be super religious, forgive me for my constant references to God. I love Him sooo much, and I have to give honor to the One who has brought me through. Bear with me! :) Below are some of my highlights from 2012:
1. In March 2012, ~ 2 weeks before I was scheduled to run my first 10K in Charleston, I fell and hurt my knee while trying to keep a co-worker's child from hurting himself. Praise God, I did not break anything. With determination and training, I was able to run most of my race without hurting, and despite being in a minor car accident the night before the race. The Devil was defeated that weekend!
2. I ran a 5K my birthday weekend in July in St. Augustine, with some wonderful friends of mine. I PR'd too, beating my last 5K time by about 8 minutes!
3. I had to put my beloved car, Terra (2005 Nissan Xterra) to rest. I was so blessed to have her car payment free thanks to my family for 7 years, without any major problems until this year. Now, I have a car payment :(. I am thankful for provision and being able to pay it on time!
4. I got to go to New York (finally!) for the 1st time with my mother in May. I believe it is probably the most memorable trip I have had with my mom. She had a lot of energy, and because she was raised there, she knew the city well. I ran the Brooklyn Bridge(it is only a little over a mile long)! I got to see my first Broadway play, on Broadway (A Streetcar Named Desire). We navigated the subways, streets and burrows like pros. We walked for miles daily, and it was such a great adventure. New York is not the prettiest place in the world, but there is something about it that I absolutely loved; a rugged charm, perhaps? I can't wait to go back hopefully in the coming year!
5. I met and continue to meet up with a great AP (accountability partner) through my association with Black Girls Run. She is a healthcare professional, with a big family and busy schedule like myself. She is one of the few "nuts" willing to get up with me at 5 in the morning on a Saturday, in the freezing cold to run. And I am a better runner because of her.
6. I participated in the First Annual Black Girls Run 10 K Race and Conference in Atlanta in September. It was an awesome experience with some beautiful ladies from all over the country celebrating our health and also benefitting the homeless. I also PR'd in this race, beating my last 10 K time by 12 minutes! I can't wait until this year's conference. I am sure it will be an even greater success because the word has spread like wildfire that Black women are on the move!
7. I reached my weight loss goal of 150 lbs in September! It only took about 20 months to do it with hard work, change of habits, and prayer!
8. I got to speak at a running buddy's church in October, along with two other ladies, about my weight loss journey. It was a very humbling experience. I had to show pictures of my old self, the self I still sometimes see in the mirror but it is just an allusion. I prayed that I at least helped one lady want to change her life in a positive way. The Church needs to not only be a place for spiritual well being, but all around health as well. I hope to continue doing events like this in the coming year.
9. I celebrated my 7th wedding anniversary in November. It is always a miracle to me that we made it another year (joking!) I have developed a fierce love for my husband over the years, especially this past year. I am so proud of the changes he is trying to make as a person, and we are really developing a new found passion for one another. Very grateful!
10. My beautiful baby boy David turned 5 one day after our anniversary! I can't believe it...I still remember the day he magically appeared in my world(well, it might not have been magic, more like science, with a whole lot of God mixed in). He is the product of a love so deep, and I am so proud of him!
11. I ran in my first half marathon in Huntersville, NC in 2 hrs 22 minutes, beating my goal of 2 hours and 30 minutes! Yes, I am still amazed. I proudly rock the "13.1" sticker on the back of my car, because I earned it! I just started running last year and could hardly run a 5k. Now I plan on doing 1 half marathon every 3 months!
12. I got to be apart of a spirit filled Christmas at Elevation Church in Charlotte, NC. I handed out bibles to people who were giving their lives over to Christ. I also got to pray with some people, too. You'd be surprised what a big impact a little prayer can make. It was wonderful to see whole families and kids stand up and declare a new life for themselves. A very emotional moment!
This list is only a fraction of what God has done for me over the past year. There are so many things He does behind the scenes. There is so much prep work involved to get me ready for the next blessing, the next trial. 2013 will also be the second year I am participating in the Daniel Fast. For two weeks I will be "eating clean": no additives, no dairy products, no flour enriched products. The diet consist of mostly fruits, veggies, water. I will also be taking a hiatus from certain distractions (i.e facebook, with the exception of communicating with my BGR family about running events). During this time, I just pray for focus and direction from God. I have so many goals for 2013, which I will go into detail in the coming months. I am already looking forward to being a Matron of Honor for the first time, paying off debt, my parents moving closer to me, starting a weight loss small group in the summer through my church, and hopefully expanding my family;)
Stay tuned, the adventure is getting to its climax....Happy New Year, and again, thank you all so much for sharing this journey with me. It is your encouragement and love that keeps me fueled and ready to take on the next challenge!
Most of us are reflecting on the joys and sorrows, the triumphs and losses of the year right about now. A tradition I deeply miss is being able to go to my hometown church, Mt Vernon Missionary Baptist in Jacksonville, FL on New Year's Eve. There was always tons of singing, testimonies, and reflection on those members who have gone on to glory. A few minutes before midnight, we would all get on our knees and pray. Then the pastor announces the New Year! It was such a good feeling to be in a place I felt safe and loved. Although I won't be home for New Year's this year, I plan on getting on my knees five minutes before midnight, and thanking God for the blessings and the trials he has brought me through this past year. For those of you who may not be super religious, forgive me for my constant references to God. I love Him sooo much, and I have to give honor to the One who has brought me through. Bear with me! :) Below are some of my highlights from 2012:
1. In March 2012, ~ 2 weeks before I was scheduled to run my first 10K in Charleston, I fell and hurt my knee while trying to keep a co-worker's child from hurting himself. Praise God, I did not break anything. With determination and training, I was able to run most of my race without hurting, and despite being in a minor car accident the night before the race. The Devil was defeated that weekend!
2. I ran a 5K my birthday weekend in July in St. Augustine, with some wonderful friends of mine. I PR'd too, beating my last 5K time by about 8 minutes!
3. I had to put my beloved car, Terra (2005 Nissan Xterra) to rest. I was so blessed to have her car payment free thanks to my family for 7 years, without any major problems until this year. Now, I have a car payment :(. I am thankful for provision and being able to pay it on time!
4. I got to go to New York (finally!) for the 1st time with my mother in May. I believe it is probably the most memorable trip I have had with my mom. She had a lot of energy, and because she was raised there, she knew the city well. I ran the Brooklyn Bridge(it is only a little over a mile long)! I got to see my first Broadway play, on Broadway (A Streetcar Named Desire). We navigated the subways, streets and burrows like pros. We walked for miles daily, and it was such a great adventure. New York is not the prettiest place in the world, but there is something about it that I absolutely loved; a rugged charm, perhaps? I can't wait to go back hopefully in the coming year!
5. I met and continue to meet up with a great AP (accountability partner) through my association with Black Girls Run. She is a healthcare professional, with a big family and busy schedule like myself. She is one of the few "nuts" willing to get up with me at 5 in the morning on a Saturday, in the freezing cold to run. And I am a better runner because of her.
6. I participated in the First Annual Black Girls Run 10 K Race and Conference in Atlanta in September. It was an awesome experience with some beautiful ladies from all over the country celebrating our health and also benefitting the homeless. I also PR'd in this race, beating my last 10 K time by 12 minutes! I can't wait until this year's conference. I am sure it will be an even greater success because the word has spread like wildfire that Black women are on the move!
7. I reached my weight loss goal of 150 lbs in September! It only took about 20 months to do it with hard work, change of habits, and prayer!
8. I got to speak at a running buddy's church in October, along with two other ladies, about my weight loss journey. It was a very humbling experience. I had to show pictures of my old self, the self I still sometimes see in the mirror but it is just an allusion. I prayed that I at least helped one lady want to change her life in a positive way. The Church needs to not only be a place for spiritual well being, but all around health as well. I hope to continue doing events like this in the coming year.
9. I celebrated my 7th wedding anniversary in November. It is always a miracle to me that we made it another year (joking!) I have developed a fierce love for my husband over the years, especially this past year. I am so proud of the changes he is trying to make as a person, and we are really developing a new found passion for one another. Very grateful!
10. My beautiful baby boy David turned 5 one day after our anniversary! I can't believe it...I still remember the day he magically appeared in my world(well, it might not have been magic, more like science, with a whole lot of God mixed in). He is the product of a love so deep, and I am so proud of him!
11. I ran in my first half marathon in Huntersville, NC in 2 hrs 22 minutes, beating my goal of 2 hours and 30 minutes! Yes, I am still amazed. I proudly rock the "13.1" sticker on the back of my car, because I earned it! I just started running last year and could hardly run a 5k. Now I plan on doing 1 half marathon every 3 months!
12. I got to be apart of a spirit filled Christmas at Elevation Church in Charlotte, NC. I handed out bibles to people who were giving their lives over to Christ. I also got to pray with some people, too. You'd be surprised what a big impact a little prayer can make. It was wonderful to see whole families and kids stand up and declare a new life for themselves. A very emotional moment!
This list is only a fraction of what God has done for me over the past year. There are so many things He does behind the scenes. There is so much prep work involved to get me ready for the next blessing, the next trial. 2013 will also be the second year I am participating in the Daniel Fast. For two weeks I will be "eating clean": no additives, no dairy products, no flour enriched products. The diet consist of mostly fruits, veggies, water. I will also be taking a hiatus from certain distractions (i.e facebook, with the exception of communicating with my BGR family about running events). During this time, I just pray for focus and direction from God. I have so many goals for 2013, which I will go into detail in the coming months. I am already looking forward to being a Matron of Honor for the first time, paying off debt, my parents moving closer to me, starting a weight loss small group in the summer through my church, and hopefully expanding my family;)
Stay tuned, the adventure is getting to its climax....Happy New Year, and again, thank you all so much for sharing this journey with me. It is your encouragement and love that keeps me fueled and ready to take on the next challenge!
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